Enjoying life

The Torah calls a nazir holy, and in the same breath says he must bring a sin offering. Rashi brings Rabbi Elazar HaKappar: his sin was denying himself wine. So is he holy or guilty? One answer settles it, but then the Ramban on "kedoshim tihiyu" seems to praise exactly this kind of abstaining, and the contradiction returns. At a eulogy for Rav Steinman, one speaker describes him in a way the next speaker politely corrects, and the correction holds the real answer.